Sunday, July 16, 2017

Talk Into Your Shoulder


Dear, Ms. Blabby

 It happened again. Let me explain. Yesterday, I took a walk to a local mom and pop store. I was early so it was just myself and an employee. We said our "hellos" as she let me in the door. She complimented me on my choice of purse, then proceeded to follow me as she talked. The problem was, I don't think she was talking to me. It's rather disconcerting. I confirmed my assumption when I asked, "What?" (Never said I was articulate) She chuckled and said she was just talking out loud. Yeah, I can hear you, lady. (sort of) She continued to talk, sometimes looking at me, as I nodded and slowly moved away from her. My hearing is not the best. I blame listening to Baba O'Riley at 120 decibels back in the day. I hate to ask people to speak up because I am hearing challenged. Sometimes I just think people mumble. How do I handle weird situations when I'm not sure if people are actually talking to me? Don't tell me they usually will be looking at you as they speak. I have found out that not to be the case. What do I do, Blabby?

If Lips are Moving

Dear Ms. Lips,

 Oh, I know your dilemma. Why just the other day I had a lovely conversation with the plumber, only to realize later he had been talking to his boss on his cell phone. I did think it odd he talked into his shoulder the whole time.

Dear, it's a new world. Just assume if you are in the same space as this other person who is babbling, they are speaking to someone who is not there. It's confusing, I know, but it's a new world, one I think has become rather isolated and anti-social, no matter the new tech ways to communicate.
Read my lips, dear. You can ask, "You talkin' to me?" or, babble into your own shoulder. That way people will assume you are hip to the new way of the world.

Sincerely, Ms. Blabby.

P.S. "It's (not) only teenage wasteland..."

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