Wednesday, July 26, 2017

Our State Fair


You have to go to at least one fair during the Summer, so, why not go to the king of fairs, the State Fair? There is nothing like holding a giant cream puff, melting ice cream cone, and cotton candy, whilst perusing the piggy pens. You must spend $75 pounding on moles to win a $2 stuffed frog.

Start early, throw sleeping kids, grumpy partner, soggy sandwiches, and lots of water (must leave in car. Not the kids or partner. Just the food.) into vehicle.

See...

the bunnies...

chickens...

cows... "mooooooo."

Eat...

cream puffs...


cotton candy...

grilled corn...

cheese curds...

anything on a stick.

Whack...

a mole...

Enough whacking.

Ride the...

Fireball...

Roller coaster...

Ferris Wheel...

Tilt a Whirl...

Sit in the...

beer garden...

shade...

porta potty.

Don't forget...

wipes...

aspirin...

sunscreen....

and kids.

And remember, it's only once a year.


Tuesday, July 25, 2017

Fin


Seems some folks are upset with the Discovery channel. They promised a race between Michael Phelps and a shark. I guess a computerized shark wasn't good enough. People expected Phelps to race against the real thing.

Let's pause for a minute and let that sink in (pun). A real shark. Discovery never claimed it would use Jaw's cousin, Morty, to race, then eat, Phelps. I'm sure they didn't mind that some people assumed such a contest.

I'm guessing some of these people also enjoy NASCAR, bullfighting, and boxing.

Really. A real shark.

Sunday, July 23, 2017

Sister Whoa, Woes

Dear Ms. Blabby,

 Me again. This time a more serious dilemma, one that is making my tummy hurt. Okay, here goes...

I don't have a lot of money, but it's enough for me. I pay bills on time and eat well... The issue it seems with my big sister is that I should save the little I have left. For me, that extra is what keeps me happy. I go on trips. Nothing outrageous, just trips around the country. I even try and go the cheapest way. Yeah, so piggy bank is rather low, really low, like $50- 60 low most times.

Big sister is angry with me. She even went so far as to tell me I should cancel next trip, which has already been bought and paid for. I know she worries. We came from nothing, had nothing. For this, she is the worry wart and counts every penny. Yes, she is doing well. Obviously, I have chosen the other road, one where money doth not matter. When I have it, I spend it. I'm living in the present.

Sedona, Arizona, next trip

I love my sister, yet, she has always judged me and I'm getting too old for this. Our relationship has been sporadic, not even seeing each other for years because we are so different. It's just in the few past years that we have tried to be real sisters. I don't want to lose that, but my guilt and tummy cannot continue.

What do I do, Ms. Blabby?


Hello, Dear friends, Ms. Blabby is offline for the next few weeks. Take care!

Friday, July 21, 2017

Plan B From Spaced Out

Hilarious. Besides the news that Trumpet is talking about pardoning himself and his clan, this dude came up with a funny one. Yeah.

Thursday, July 20, 2017

Over The Moon


On this day, way back, on this date, a man walked/hopped on the moon. So they say...

I love a good conspiracy. Given that Trump hasn't opened his gob about aliens coming to town (unless he is one) I'm assuming we haven't had any visitors, yet. I used to believe everything that was written in the papers. Now, I read everything with a bit of cynicism. I'm not going as far as our "leader," who sees "fakers" behind every bush. But, we do have to question and verify every bit of information we are given.

So, on that note, I'm giving the conspiracy theorists some space (good pun) as well  Right, HERE.

Tuesday, July 18, 2017

Don't Ask, Do Tell


This little story is so intriguing. A house for sale, plus (read, HERE) you get the mystery tenant upstairs, and you cannot bother that tenant under any circumstances. Ha! There is no way I'm not gonna look to see who is up there.

Yet again, I'd have to think about buying it. Could be anyone...

Elvis

Amelia

Hoffa

The Grim Reaper....

Monday, July 17, 2017

Romancing the Revolution


Wow, what f-ing B-s*#!. Women who chose to find true love with ISIS scum, now, some claim they had no idea what these men were like. Who are they trying to fool? If you can read, if you have some intelligence, if you live on this planet, you know how vile and disgusting these animals are. Did these women think it was going to be some romantic adventure? It just boils my blood. Now, these women have children, these women are not welcome home, their idea of love and loyalty, shattered.

Tough shit. ladies. I don't know what is going to happen to you. Perhaps, some time in prison? That should squash any sense of romanticism you see from death, rape, torture, that blinds your vision.

Sunday, July 16, 2017

Talk Into Your Shoulder


Dear, Ms. Blabby

 It happened again. Let me explain. Yesterday, I took a walk to a local mom and pop store. I was early so it was just myself and an employee. We said our "hellos" as she let me in the door. She complimented me on my choice of purse, then proceeded to follow me as she talked. The problem was, I don't think she was talking to me. It's rather disconcerting. I confirmed my assumption when I asked, "What?" (Never said I was articulate) She chuckled and said she was just talking out loud. Yeah, I can hear you, lady. (sort of) She continued to talk, sometimes looking at me, as I nodded and slowly moved away from her. My hearing is not the best. I blame listening to Baba O'Riley at 120 decibels back in the day. I hate to ask people to speak up because I am hearing challenged. Sometimes I just think people mumble. How do I handle weird situations when I'm not sure if people are actually talking to me? Don't tell me they usually will be looking at you as they speak. I have found out that not to be the case. What do I do, Blabby?

If Lips are Moving

Dear Ms. Lips,

 Oh, I know your dilemma. Why just the other day I had a lovely conversation with the plumber, only to realize later he had been talking to his boss on his cell phone. I did think it odd he talked into his shoulder the whole time.

Dear, it's a new world. Just assume if you are in the same space as this other person who is babbling, they are speaking to someone who is not there. It's confusing, I know, but it's a new world, one I think has become rather isolated and anti-social, no matter the new tech ways to communicate.
Read my lips, dear. You can ask, "You talkin' to me?" or, babble into your own shoulder. That way people will assume you are hip to the new way of the world.

Sincerely, Ms. Blabby.

P.S. "It's (not) only teenage wasteland..."

Thursday, July 13, 2017

Don't Drown, You Clown

Courtesy, UWMadLibraries
Main Street, Kenosha, back in the day
Here we go again, Kenosha. Flooding is the big news in Southern Wisconsin. It came down and down and down. And all the houses were smoted, smited, flooded, sogged and sacked.

May I say, same old, same old...

Okay, some citizens get a pass because this truly was a nonstop deluge. Nothing you can do no matter how many sump pumps and sand bags you have.

It's the others, you know, the ones I have talked about before, the ones who continue to live in the flood plains, crossing fingers they will never have to go through what they just went through.

The Velodrome is underwater. It was just renovated last year. Oi.

Not the velodrome

I feel bad for ya all, fellow cheddarheads. The good news- I have not heard anyone dying from floods, although not from lack of some boobs trying. I didn't know illiteracy was a big problem, here, but that's another story. As news reporter stands in front of flooded road, cones in place, vehicles continue to drive through.


Well, it's their car, their life, their choice. You can swing by the local stop for a cup o' joe with your kayak, like this fellow who just had to have his coffee.





Anyhoo, we will survive. It's been a trying year for testing our inner selves. I would put the iconic image of this cat... Oh, what the hell...






Wednesday, July 12, 2017

Do As I Say, Not As I Do


Really? Really!? We are supposed to believe the Jr. met with nefarious persons to get dirt on Hillary without Daddy Trumpbucks knowing? Those boys kiss daddy's tiny hands, and do nothing without his knowledge- let me add- allegedly. Let's just imagine Clinton meeting with Russians. Oh, I can see the uproar from the Trump clan. And what the hell is Ivanka doing amongst world leaders!?

This is all highly


  • incredible

    • laughable
    • ludicrous
    • nonsensical
    • outrageous
    • preposterous
    • silly
    • unbelievable
    • wacky
    • antic
    • comic
    • comical
    • contemptible
    • daffy
    • derisory
    • droll
    • farcical
    • foolheaded
    • gelastic
    • grotesque
    • harebrained
    • hilarious
    • *Words by thesaurus.com

    Tuesday, July 11, 2017

    The First Time is Painful


    I waited so patiently for this day to come. It was my first time. My first time as a Prime member whose day of magic had come.

    (((THUD))) That's the sound of an Amazon box dropping on my head. Prime Day looks a lot like every other deal day, which is actually every day, not every other day. The thing is, the stuff they want you to buy is, shall I say it? CRAP. Oops, hope I don't lose my membership into the most elite membership, as Bezos counts his coins, laughing maniacally whilst fools feel obligated to buy something. I'm sure there is a blacklist somewhere, which keeps track of who buys and who passes up so-so, stinky deals.

    Well, the first time is usually painful and disappointing. Maybe next year, unless I'm blackballed by smiley.

    ** Update: Looks like Amazon did very well. People were buying gel pens like nobody's business.

    Our State Fair

    You have to go to at least one fair during the Summer , so, why not go to the king of fairs, the State Fair? There is nothing like hol...