Thursday, October 23, 2014

Ooooh, That Basil

Heelarious...

Fraudster pretended to be in a coma for TWO YEARS to avoid court over £40,000 scam but was caught walking around Tesco after police traced him using loyalty card 

  • Alan Knight scammed neighbour out of £40,000 but refused to go to court
  • For two years he claimed to be quadriplegic and even pretended to be in a vegetative state with no movement from the neck down
  • But he was caught by police going on shopping trips and holiday with family
  • Had been living off benefits after claiming he suffered massive neck injury
  • CCTV showed him walking around Tesco and driving his car to Dorset
  • He admitted 19 charges of forgery, fraud and theft over more than a year 
  • Judge calls Knight a 'very accomplished and determined actor' saying that he was 'nothing like in the condition he claims to be'


Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2801887/fraudster-pretended-coma-two-years-avoid-court-40-000-scam-caught-walking-tesco-police-traced-using-loyalty-card.html#ixzz3GymqubGr
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Sticks and Stones

I rarely have a plan when I sit down to write a post. Sometimes I think the night before that I have to write about so and so but by morning that thought has floated away to the brain dust bin.

I'm still thinking of something awesome to write about today, but in the meantime time I would like to be as superficial as all those people online who have made Renee Zwellinger, Zellweather... go viral.

It's her eyes! And do you know why she changed her squishy eyes? Because morons made her feel bad. I thought she was lovely in a wonky kind of way. It was what made her Renee. Now, she looks like a blonde person.

Sticks and stones will break your bones and yes, names will hurt you, no matter what the nuns from The Sisters of Lesbos have said to me in the past.

Stay tuned....

I may have a fabulous post coming up. : }

Tuesday, October 21, 2014

Let it BLOOOOOOOOWWWWW


Tis the season... where Thingy's nose runs like a broken faucet. Drip, drip. Why can't someone invent something for that? I thought of just sticking a bag under my nose for drippings. I'm tired of soggy tissue in my lady purse. So annoying. Especially when I pull out the wad with change to give to the big eyed clerk.

********************

"This is a beautifully written piece. You have a way with words."

Well, this is the nicest rejection I have received in a long time. I really don't send too many of my stuff out to be published. It's already here, published for all the world to see, for free. Yeah, that's a problem on my part. Me and Bono, so generous, until Bono backed off and sniveled like a sniveling sniveler.

REJECTED!

******************************

So, went to pumpkin farm over week-end. A tad cold. (see results, above) This was on a real farm where the pumpkins are grown right there! Big sis said she also went to a pumpkin farm and the whole thing is getting so commercialized. They shipped in their pumpkins and had mechanical minions or something that broke after so many turns.


Ah, hell, Halloween is becoming like Christmas. What happened to grabbing a brown bag from yer Ma's stack and just trolling for sweets? Yeah, yeah, no more brown bags. Ya can't get away with a little charcoal on yer face and a hobo bag.

Okay, Thingy signing off. I'll be over ta Bingo Palace if ya want me.
 

Monday, October 20, 2014

Get Back to Where You Once Belonged!


Do you believe in ghosts? I usually say no, but I look around to see if any misty apparitions are around when I say that. I have to admit, ever since I have moved into my old house, I've been getting weird vibes and worse, something feeling me up. The first time this happened, I had been sleeping when I startled awake, although, I wasn't sure if I was in a dream/awake state. It's one of those awful moments where I want to move, but cannot. Then I feel something press against my back. I am trying so hard to push it away but can't move. It is such an awful feeling.

The next incident occurred when I was reading a book in my comfy chair and felt someone touch my shoulder.

The last eerie event happened when I was going into the kitchen and felt something brush past me.

I don't want my beautiful home to become a place I dread. I just want the thing to go away.

Okay, you? Make like a tree and leave.

Thursday, October 16, 2014

"Straighten Your Muff, Gram!"



Stop snickering! Poor Fred. "They" say, "Don't worry, no one will remember." Oh, yeah? Read Fred's obit.

But, back to that word, "Muff." It looked like every newspaper back in 1912 used that word to describe poor Fred's infamous move. Back in my Gram's day, I'm sure a muff meant something she held in her hands. Stop laughing! Today, it means something else. There is even a website dedicated to the ladies. Good grief, what would Oscar Wilde say? Or, Marie Antoinette?

From, History.com


On October 16, 1912, New York Giants outfielder Fred Snodgrass drops an easy pop-up in the 10th inning of the tiebreaking eighth game of the World Series against the Red Sox. His error led to a two-run Boston rally and cost the Giants the championship.
Snodgrass, who had been a catcher for the Hoegee Flags, joined the New York Giants in 1908. He spent most of the next two years on the bench, but in 1910, when the team’s manager suggested that he try playing a different position, the third-string catcher became a full-time outfielder. He was a good batter and a reliable fielder on an impressive team—Rube Marquard, Christy Mathewson and Jeff Tesreau owned the pitcher’s mound, and Fred Merkle, Chief Meyers and Larry Doyle all hit over .300. By the end of the 1912 season, the Giants were way ahead of every team in their league, and the Boston Red Sox, the AL champs, were almost as good. The World Series promised to be an exciting one.
In the first game at the Polo Grounds on October 8, the Red Sox beat the Giants 4-2. The second, at Fenway Park, was tied 6-6 when umpire Silk O’Laughlin called it in the eleventh because it had grown too dark to see the ball. The Giants won the third; the Sox won the fourth and the fifth; the Giants won the sixth and the seventh. The tied Series would go to an eighth game.
And so it happened that Fred Snodgrass was standing in center field on October 16. After nine innings of the eighth game, the score was tied 1-1. At the top of the 10th, the Giants pulled ahead by 1. At the bottom of the 10th, Red Sox pinch hitter Clyde Engle came to the plate and whacked a lazy fly ball to right-center field. It drifted easily toward Snodgrass’ glove. He caught the ball; then he dropped the ball. Engle scrambled to second. In the very next play, Snodgrass made a spectacular catch, but it didn’t matter—the damage was done. Mathewson walked the following batter, and then a single tied the game and put the winning run on third. Then Tris Speaker hit a single—after Merkle and Meyers both failed to catch an easy foul ball that Speaker wafted right at them, it should be noted—and the game was over. The Red Sox had won. To reporter after reporter, over and over, Snodgrass explained: "I just dropped the darn thing."
The error—dubbed "the $30,000 muff" because that’s how much money the Giants stood to win from a Series championship—stuck with Snodgrass for his whole life. After he retired from baseball, the hapless outfielder moved to California and became a banker. He bought a ranch. The citizens of Oxnard elected him mayor. But still, when he died in 1974—62 years after that fateful World Series game—the New York Times headline blared: "Fred Snodgrass, 86, Dead; Ball Player Muffed 1912 Fly."



But, hey, if baseball ain't your game, let us go back to 1976 when every young kid in America came down with tone deafitis.

 

Tuesday, October 14, 2014

The Very Big, Huge Elephant


I heard this story back in July from my baby sister. It still gnaws at me for so many reasons.

She told me her coworkers had stayed after hours one night to have a few drinks in the local watering hole where she had worked for a few years. She considered her co-workers part of her family. On this night she was drinking tequila. Not a good thing at any time. She knew she was past her limit but wasn't ready to leave. She said she felt no pain which was good considering what happened next. She says she remembered tripping over a bar stool and hitting the back of her head on something. The owner of the bar, her pal, "Dick" picked her up and told her he would drive her home. The ride to her house was a blur to her but she does recall banging on her front door to wake her roommate because she had lost her keys. When no one answered "Dick" thought it best she try and climb in a window. The kitchen window was the only option. When her boss finally got the window open they were ... with a stack of very sharp and clean knives standing blade up; just the way her roommate insisted knives should be placed. This did not stop "Dick" from lifting my sister up and shoving her into the kitchen sink where she fell onto the floor and crawled her way to her bedroom.

When she woke up the next morning, the first thing she noticed was her bed covered in blood. She had no recollection of what had happened to her the night before. She walked to the bathroom feeling nauseous and dizzy. When she looked in the mirror she saw her face and clothes splattered with blood. She didn't even know if it was her own blood. Since most of the blood seemed to be located at the back of her head she felt around her scalp until she discovered not a cut, but a deep gash. Slowly, what happened the night before started coming back to her. She remembered drinking, then tripping. After that, the rest of the evening was still hazy.

She took some aspirin, cleaned herself up and headed to work. When she arrived she noticed the stares from her co-workers. One of her female co-workers who was there the night before and witnessed the incident asked her if she was okay, then told her what had happened. The missing pieces of the puzzle were beginning to fit. "Anna" told her "Dick got scared. He didn't want little sister to sue "My ass." He drove her home hoping she'd forget what had transpired.

At this point, as sister is telling me the story, I wanted to ask where this bar was because I was going to head over there and do some damage to this ass-hole. I held my tongue as she smiled at me and said it was her fault. She had no intention of suing anyone, they were all buddies.

One of the bartenders suggested she head over to the hospital (no one volunteered to take her) and get her injury taken care of. I don't recall how many stiches she told me she had gotten but I do remember I gasped. She laughed as this was just another day in the life of sissy and swore she would no longer drink.  I had heard that before from our dear old mother. We had both gone through living with an alcoholic, yet, here  was my baby sister doing the same thing. I felt sick. I wanted to scream at her. I wanted to take her in my arms and just hold her. But, I did none of these things. We talked about our plans for the day and like days from our past we ignored the big old elephant in the room.



**I'm sure this needs editing, but I just needed to write it down

Saturday, October 11, 2014

The Way We Were





And where were you? SNL. Yeah. Late night snacking, lots of laughing, Dad yelling something about the noise level, I dunno, I couldn't hear what he said, Joe's Pizza, Mike's kisses, getting high on weed and John Belushi, pulling the phone cord as far as it would go so nosey mother and siblings couldn't hear as I talked to friends, waited for Mike, cried for Mike, laughed at Chevy, cut my hair, cut my jeans, living life with Jane and the gang.

Thanks, guys.

 

Friday, October 10, 2014

Politics and Women!? What an Oxymoron

Oh, I just can't decide how to vote. Scott Walker or that woman, Burker something, something. I mean, come on, Scott is sooooo dreamy. I guess I have time to decide and I don't need any I.D. cause those sexy men in their awesome black robes said I don't need to show my fugly drivers license photo. Gosh, men are the best.

So is Kristen Schaal.

 

Schoep the Dog Dies





I hate it when I watch some mystery/true crime, and or news and never get an update on what happened. Sorry so late with this one. It is such a lovely story.

Sweet Schoep. What a great guy his daddy is.